August 19-21, 2017
Where will you be for the solar eclipse?
Superhero and I considered enjoying the eclipse from a boat in Charleston, SC. Then we changed our minds to consider a crab and shrimp feast a little closer, but I probably would have missed the eclipse if food was involved. Finally, we decided to plan a break at work and enjoy the 86% experience we hope to see. Then, get back to work. Superhero showed this video to me and I wanted to share it. Now seemed like a good time because the beginning piece looks like the center of a sun.
I’ve been watching posts on facebook of all the eclipse chasers. It’s awesome. Thanks for sharing. From time to time I see things and I think…I wonder if they threw those mugs on a wheel, or Is that the same place we were a few years ago? I try to be more mindful these days about asking questions and blurting observations, and just try to listen more.
Kim Harrison is doing a writer’s critique group at her blog. If you are a writer it’s a great opportunity to get feedback from an author who knows what keeps people turning pages.
I’m working on the third chapter right now which is a new edition to the rewrite. The first fifty pages (roughly chapter one and two) have a lot of scene breaks and I worry about it getting choppy. However, I need to get the characters identified and get the story rolling early. I’m trying to use enough world building and plot to break up some of the character arc development. I like posting to the writer group because you realize you don’t have a page to convey your message. One paragraph or a few sentences of dialogue and it better be there, and not just ok or good or else the reader just lays the book down and maybe picks it up again, maybe not. The reader landscape is changing. I have books right now that were fine, but I laid them down and I still haven’t picked them back up. I think one of the greatest joys about where I am right now as a writer is I can see the book being something I want to read.
This is the next section. It is not chapter two, but rather the section that follows the scene break. I’m using it because it is one of my main characters and I want to convey a little of her character arc while giving the reader some orientation about the Orbiter.
Three floors above them Sylvia Debair’s foot caught on the treadway and she stumbled into the orbiter because she was staring at the markings on the column.
“Watch were you’re going!” A man blasted over his shoulder when she bumped him.
She blushed, feeling clumsy and angry at the same time. People didn’t even bother to look at her when they were angry with her. She should have stuck with archeology, success as a writer amounted to being as invisible as she had been twenty-five feet into a tomb—alone, but now she was forced among the people she observed rather than just their history.
“Finger please.” The stewardess said, her eyes covered with goggles that looked to Sylvia as if she was prepared for vascular surgery on a fly.
The next few lines follow in the work, but I didn’t post to the writing group because we limit the amount per post. The limitation is good because it forces you to put your best work at the top. I noticed that the action doesn’t start till here and it is beyond the post cut off. So, I asked myself – “Do I rearrange it to put this at the top”? I like the first line I have because it adds orientation for the reader about where the character is in relationship to others so I felt I should leave it. I’ll get feedback and use that along with what is already rolling around in my head to make my decision.
“Your finger.” The lady said again. This time looking up from the podium where her focus had been.
Where is Meki? Sylvia swallowed hard reaching her hand to the woman, uncertain which finger she wanted. “What are you doing?” She asked quietly, ashamed to jerk her hand away like an idiot, but not comfortable with the instrument the woman reached to take from the wall.
Each time I read it I see a way to improve it. I guess that will always be true. My thoughts this weekend are about the little things—doing the things you enjoy, being with people you love, sharing with others your strengths, it adds up. So, keep doing the little things because big things don’t happen overnight.